Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Congruence in any fashion is, well, hard !

     Congruence has not always been an understood word in my vocabulary.  For so many decades I used the word in so many way, which were not all right.  I just had no clue what the word meant.  Neither the definition or the intent of the word meant anything in my life.

   Of course I should have noted that this word "congruent" was popping up in many forms in math situations.  Same size and shaped stuff, they were said to be in congruence. No. No impact at all on my life.  A "numba" is just a "numba".  Congruent or congruence did nothing for me.

   On entering this 12 step recovery program I was urged; directed; told; ordered to "walk my talk".  Fine.  I would be quiet.  If I did not espouse nor articulate nor pontificate then I did not have to "walk my talk".  Oh yeah, for those that know me at all.   I am going to be quiet?  For how long?  One of my early sponsors mused out loud one evening at our home group meeting that; "if you ever shut up you will blow up".   I have literally taken him at his word for the last 40 years.  After all, he died happy, joyous and free, a winner.  So I guess walking my talk became a goal for life, one spirited moment after another.

     Nearly 20 years ago, once again my nemesis in life, aka. "Little ole' lady" popped up from her knitting during a meeting and stabbed me in the heart with her pointed finger and sizzling words of; "you need to learn to live a congruent life!"  Right.  Go back to your knit one pearl two and leave me alone I mumbled.  Goofy ole' lady, what the hell does she mean congruent life?  I am supposed to be the same shape or size as someone else?  Nut cake.

     It only took me nearly 3 months of letting the nut cakes words ferment in my brain before I hit the dictionary.  Hmmm, "...matching or in agreement with something" was one of the listed definitions".  Let's see, "walk your talk" vs "matching or in agreement with something".  Wow, the nut cake was divinely inspired to give me the same message I had gotten 20 years earlier.  It would appear that the God of my understanding either had a sense of humor and loved to have nut cakes (ie. Little ole' ladys) babble at me or IT was once again giving me a thought that I could not get for myself.  

     It was at this time in my life that I began a serious attempt to bring my actions into line with the underlying principles of the originally written 12 steps.  It was also at this time in my life that my life took on new shape, new dynamics, new forms or joy and happiness and most of all a new direction spiritually.  I was on the precipice of growing up and maturing.  Not bad for 50+ years old eh?  

     Today the word congruent and its form of congruence play a large part in my living process.  It has taken a huge amount of attention to life details, honesty at a level I had never practiced, learned compassion, patience which I never knew existed and Love that I have found deep within me.  All of these traits were there all my life, I just did not know them.  I have had the ability to live a congruent life since I was born.  I had never been taught how.  

     I was capable of "walking my talk" for decades, I just did not know I was supposed to.  Just for today I am conscious of that Power Greater than myself that; "...resides deep within me" and I know that IT is what gives me the momentary ability to "walk my talk" and in fact live a congruent life.

     Today I am most grateful for all of those "little ole' ladies" that loved me so much that they would indeed be my nemesis throughout my tenure in this wonderful fellowship.

Love and light


Living serenely = congruency