Sunday, March 6, 2011

Pocket Idols?, Knock on Wood?, nahhhh

Is there more than just the 12 Steps?  Of course!  I would ultimately find such great things as; maturity, change of  habits, understanding of my inner most self.  All things that were never ever on my mind before I met the 12 Steps.

I just read a very candid, honest blog entry by someone writing on "rituals".  Interesting subject for a 12 Stepper and probably will turn into a subject that is ongoing for life.  At least for me this subject has caused me to become very much that which I always wanted to be.  An "in touch with, attention paying child of the Most High or HP".

When I was being raised by the tribe, my name for family, friends, etc. while growing up, I learned all that I was supposed I guess about luck, fortune, or we could call it the "easier softer way".  After all, when I wanted something for myself or something to occur that probably was not within my grasp I was taught to ask or seek "Good Luck".  Knock on wood three times, throw salt over my shoulder, (did this once to my ex wifes' horrification, the salt was in the shaker still) and all the other "good luck" talismans or sayings one can imagine.  By far and wide, I never really had any of this good luck happen to me.  I also noted other instances in life where people were calling up some unseen powerful "thing" to help them with their fame or fortune or good luck.  Everything from rubbing Buddhas belly to carry a four leaf clover.  Again, none of that ever worked for me.  Always gave me a feeling of; "how come I  never get nothing?".  Bad English and even worse living habit.

When I began to effect the principles of the 12 Steps in my life and I began to change, well grow up or mature is more like it. I started getting the idea that these rituals for me were not what I should be relying upon.  It was shared with me that maybe I should place that dependence for the correct process in my life with an entity which could actually deliver, no luck involved.  Your idea for me was to make that entity God or my HP.  The late Dr. Emmet Fox writes; "...there is no such thing as luck there is only God.".  Well when I first read "Sermon on the Mount" by Dr. Fox I was convinced that my mentors (sponsor) and Fox were onto something.  Hmmmmm, turn my thoughts to HP. Yep, this one was gonna work, as long as I  did it that is.

For me to bring this simple concept into my life though I would have to do some ritual house cleaning and cutting and begin some new rituals.  Like, pray all the time.  Pray for others which brought me into line with the Divine, be thankful/grateful for what is and not wheedle or cajole for what isn't.  This process was not for the feint at heart.  I would share this idea with many and they would just look at me.  However, the proof was  "in the pudding".

My life began to get extremely simpler and better.  The more I let go of my past rituals and became ensconced in my new patterns of life, the happier and more free I became.  In my 3rd year of this new way of life I did hit a wall which I would then ignore and turn a blind eye to.  It was way to hard and scared the heck out of me.  In fact it was one of my new found ideas/rituals.  It was started by an angel in this fellowship named Sister Ignatia and kept alive, well at least until today.  I was to have the passing thought of; "hmmmm I guess the power is not in the chip (medallion) it is in the Power Greater than myself.  Oh boy. Nope, could not deal with this and did not until the year of 1993 - 1994.

I made the conscious decision "FOR ME and me alone" that I would not carry nor accept any more "gold plated bronze medallions" as recognition for doing what I should be doing naturally and all my life, "...Being of maximum service to God and those about me".  Again, Dr. Emmet Fox writes of "pocket idols" and now I understand that term.  This was a very big ritual for me to overcome.

Today I make a conscious effort to rid myself of rituals thinking that all of them actually represented "pocket idols" to my unconscious.  Why not?  I was raised/taught that way.  Keeping me in the present moment where my HP lives, moves and has IT's being has replaced, well almost completely, these "pocket idols".  I am such a happy, joyous and free person through prayer and meditation as opposed to a querulous and disappointed personal through ritual.  It is one my most favor thoughts that "praise and worship" works, with HP, myself and ALL others.

Now if I could just figure out where to "pigeon hole" the thought process which has me buy lotto tickets each week.  Just for today I am putting this under the heading of; "...I must do the foot work, etc.".

I thank and bless Lisa for the idea and push to write this portion of my life.

Love and Light,

aka ezduzit777

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