Friday, February 25, 2011

Tip of the Iceberg? Hmmmm

   In my early years growing up I had heard the expression; "...this is just the tip of the iceberg.".  Wasn't really sure about that until a little later in life in science in school.  Ok, 1/7th showing, rest submerged and not seen.  That made sense to my young active scientific mind.  When it came to the expression representing something other than actual icebergs I was kinda without a clue.
   Then came the horrible time we are supposed to begin to mature, mmmm around 11 years old for me.  I had began a nearly lifelong trait of sidestepping anything I needed to resolve any form of emotional concern in my life.
   I would see a problem, the whole world would see my problem.  What I also began to see was the problem was way worse than anyone else could see.  Hence, the 6/7ths of the problem under the surface and dangerous.  This is the point in my life I discovered alcohol could hide even the 6/7ths of the problem.  Magic eh?  Well not really.
   After suffering a real dose of "self" for nearly 21 years, the forces of life dictated it was time to quit using alcohol as an escape route.  That was good right?  No.  Now I would have to start looking at and working on all these problems that were being noticed by the world around me, remember the 1/7th has shown all these years, and now I had to tackle the 6/7ths, a task I at first was not up for nor equipped to handle.
   I had anethesised my way through all the horrors of puberty, adolesence, and the normal teenage maturing process.  I was a 11 year old child in a 32 year old body.  I had problems that should have been dealt with 20 years hence and they all were lurking deep within me.....the 6/7ths syndrome I nicknamed it.
   Through diligent and repeated use of the principles of the original 12 Steps I was able, with a lot of inside and outside help to attack these problems one by one.  Dredging up the entire 6/7ths of a character defect is just not for the feint at heart, especially when they normally dealt with those fun subjects as; sex, drugs n rock n roll.  Or at least one out of three.
   Compounding these Herculean efforts was one of my other lifelong characteristics of dishonesty.  I had graduated to the point of telling lies when the truth would have been more in my favor.  That my friends is in fact crazy.  Yep.  That was me.  When I and all the newfound help I was receiving would look at one of these 6/7th problems, my honesty factor would shy away and stand back and tell me; "your on your own here.". At times I referred to my EGO as "chicken".
   All this soul baring is leading me to say that after lonnnnng term participation, 37 years to be exact, and lots and lots and lots and lots of work on the inside of me, I now find, well you guessed it.  A few more subjects  that are in fact 6/7ths of the problem and the other 1/7 is still showing. Doesn't this process ever stop?  Are there more and new icebergs created every day?  For me it appears to be a natural process.  One I must recognize and become friendly with.
   Today I make all efforts to haul those 6/7ths "things" up on the table one piece at a time, or as much as I can handle.  I still need and use all the help inside and outside I can get.  I have decided to quit being my own hero and asking for and receiving help is the way I do that.  I must admit that the crowd of "icebergs" hanging around inside of me is getting smaller and smaller in number.  I am reminded that it was not a very large iceberg that sank the Titanic but more a exquisitely  placed one just in the right spot.  Seems like "icebergs" go for quality as opposed to quantity after awhile.
   I have decided that this 1/7th idea also applies to the "Love" deep within me.  I hold that Love to be synonymous with the God of my understanding, or higher power.  You and all the world may see only the "tip of the iceberg' but I see the remaining 6/7ths through meditation and contemplation.  It is the process which is the saving grace of me today.  I put enormous efforts into displaying as much of the 6/7ths of my Love outside as I can.  There are even moments that I am able to show or manifest the entire pure love of me outside.  I call those moments sober. Whoops that sounds like I am off into another subject.  Will work on that article for a couple of days.
   Just think, when you see someone being what you think of as mad, sad, angry, upset and most of all fearful, you are probably seeing only the tip of the iceberg.  Conversely, if you feel and see Love from another human being then the 6/7ths of Love deep within them is something you may want to explore and dig after.  It is worth it.  Imagine a whole iceberg of Love.....sounds good to me.

Love and Light,

No comments:

Post a Comment